I don´t need help - do I?

You know what´s funny? Some days ago, I was asked by a person how he could help me - and I didn´t have the slightest idea of how he could.

What you need to know about me is that I´m a total giver. I´m so used to giving and supporting other people, that I never even thought about somebody supporting me in any way. I learned already as I child what I shouted out as an adult into the world: I can do this all by myself - perceiving myself as a peaceful warrior who has all the strength and power to make it, however the world might look like. And I can do it. Everyday and always.

Is this really true?

But this question kept me thinking. Is it true that I really don´t need anything? I mean, of course I feel all abundant, and I think I really am. I am very blessed with two wonderful children, a nice home, we are happy and healthy and are enjoying everyday life to the fullest. On the other hand - I am a single mom, carrying all alone on my shoulders: the kids, work, groceries, cooking, cleaning, currently also homeschooling, all projects (and by that earning money) on hold, and keeping the spirits up for all of us by creating joyful moments for all of us even during these challenging times. So: how do I even come to think I don´t need any support?

Leaving my comfort zone

Well, I am truly used to crisis. I have coped with things which have been much worse for me personally than staying at home and taking care of everything by myself. We´re healthy, we have enough food, and a warm and cozy home. We can connect with our family via phone or internet. We have a garden where we can play and connect to nature. I don´t take this for granted and am very thankful, every day.

But still - there are areas of my life which could be improved. Maybe they wouldn´t increase my happiness (because this is coming from inside and can´t be shaken by the outside world), but maybe they would increase something else: my connection. With myself and others. Because what would happen if I opened up to receive help and support as well? (Which I already do to a certain extend, but there´s definitely some space outside of my comfort zone as well ;-))

Wouldn´t my relationships brighten up, deepen, be more fulfilled (taking that the people I attract are givers like me ;-))?

Increase your connection by receiving

Imagine how the world would be if we, the givers, would totally open up to receive as well. If we started to communicate (first to ourselves, and then to others) what kind of support we would love to receive. Imagine how people around you would react if you surprised them by not only being the supportive, giving friend / family member, but also the one who´s showing up fully by opening up with all vulnerability, communicating what you really need.

I know it´s scary and might even be totally out of comfort zone, but it might also open up a wonderful field of loving, caring and well-meaning connection between you and others.

Maybe you can do the first step today and go inside to find your very personal answer to what kind of support you truly wish for. In this very moment. Just for you. Notice how you soften inside and get into a very kind, loving mode with yourself automatically, just by asking yourself this question: how can I support myself today? What do I truly wish for? How would it feel to be supported by others?

Much love to you <3 <3 <3


Cornelia Victoria

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